FlasshePoint

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Look At The Map, Add Up The Cost

Posted on | April 13, 2005 at 4:52 pm | 3 Comments

My current theories about the TV show Lost:

1) It’s a remake of The Most Dangerous Game! Some bored billionaires caused the crash so they could toy around with some innocent people and eventually hunt them all down and kill them. But they didn’t figure on little Walt and his reality-bending superpowers…

2) The island is an under-development theme park where things have gone very, very wrong. The castaways crashed there prematurely.

3) The castaways are part of a reality TV show, ala The Truman Show. In agreeing to do the show, they consented to having specific memories about the show wiped for the duration of the show. Some of the castaways are part of the crew of the show, have not had their memories wiped, and are carrying tiny cameras. The flashbacks that the castaways keep having are due to their wiped memories trying to surface. The monster is Mark Burnett.

4) The plane got caught in the same space warp as the Spindrift from the old 60s series Land of the Giants, so the castaways are trapped on the same planet of giant humans from that series. The monster is a giant human, the only one on this island.

5) The castaways are all aliens – sleeper agents who were implanted with false memories in order to pave the way for an invasion of earth. They were all called home, but an accident occurred with the plane that was supposed to rendezvous with the mothership. The accident ripped a hole into another dimension and the plane fell into it.

6) The island is in Pellucidar. The plane was really off course. Something keeps blocking out the eternal sun of Pellucidar, causing night-like periods.

7) Bob Newhart is dreaming the whole thing. Think about it – he just showed up on another popular freshman ABC show…

Latre.

Comments

3 Responses to “Look At The Map, Add Up The Cost”

  1. Miles
    April 16th, 2005 @ 12:06 am

    Pellucidar! I read all those books when I was a kid, liked ‘em better than either Tarzan or the John Carter of Mars series(es?). As for Bob Newhart, I keep wondering why all the people who said the last scene of Newhart was merely a nod to his “better” first show (me, I think Newhart was a lot better, though I love both shows as well as the first season of Bob) didn’t get what it mostly was: a joke about Mary Frann’s implants (and implant-showing-off fuzzy sweaters, too magical to touch).

  2. Flasshe
    April 16th, 2005 @ 12:11 pm

    I never read the Pellucidar books, though I did read all the John Carter ones. As far as hollow earth stuff goes, I was more into Skartaris from Mike Grell’s The Warlord.

    Sorry, but you’re whack if you think Newhart was better than the Bob Newhart Show!

  3. Miles
    April 17th, 2005 @ 12:14 am

    The Bob Newhart Show was super, funny, the very model of sitcom excellence. I loved Newhart even more, because it dared to go progressively more unhinged and surreal as it progressed. As good as The Bob Newhart Show was, it was still conventional in many ways. Newhart started much the same way, but as time went on, it wholly embraced taking things to bizarre extremes, and I reveled in the show’s willingness to take ideas to their limits and well past them. Michael’s breakdown, the Children of the Corn-like way that everyone but Dick was assimilated into the town’s weirdness, all of it was utterly captivating to me in a way that The Bob Newhart Show just can’t match. So I am whack, I guess!

    Do keep in mind that if I were grading these shows like a term paper, The Bob Newhart Show would be a 95, and Newhart a 100. It’s all good stuff.

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