Life, Minutiae, Toys, Irrational Phobias, Peeves, Fiber

Who Stole My Forks?

Posted on | November 16, 2005 at 8:01 am | 14 Comments

Notice what's missing?Seriously, where are my missing two forks, dude? I know I had eight forks a few weeks ago and now there are only six. I’ve looked everywhere, including the dishwasher and all the drawers. Six forks. That’s it. I think they’ve been missing since I hosted the family birthday dinner thing at my house a few weekends ago. So, ‘fess up? Who snagged the silver? I bet one of my nieces or nephews hid them around the house somewhere. I am not happy. Give me back my forks!



14 Responses to “Who Stole My Forks?”

  1. Rude? Me?
    November 16th, 2005 @ 10:13 am

    There’s an obvious line here, to be written by someone who bothered viewing all six of the movies, about “the dark side of the forks.” Thankfully, I’m not that person.

  2. InfK
    November 16th, 2005 @ 12:16 pm

    When are you going to invite 7 other people over for dinner, anyway?

    We have an eight-place setting and 4 chairs around our dining table (not even room enough for that many people, really). Before I was married – 1 fork, one spoon, one plate, maybe two glasses, and no dining-room table… at least as a bachelor, you have a chance to make the math work out.

    Be a Real Man and ditch five more forks.

  3. Flasshe
    November 16th, 2005 @ 12:51 pm

    If I only had one fork, then I’d have to run the dishwasher every day, and that’s wasteful.

  4. Rude? Me?
    November 16th, 2005 @ 5:34 pm

    Cleaning forks? I thought that’s what pets were for.

  5. Doug
    November 16th, 2005 @ 6:04 pm

    Dude – That is some sweet cutlery!

    I can totally see why your relatives would be interested in them. Looks like you’ll have to go back to Cracker Barrel and nab two more.

  6. Flasshe
    November 16th, 2005 @ 6:43 pm

    Stay away from my cutlery, man! I’m warnin’ ya!

  7. InfK
    November 17th, 2005 @ 4:38 am

    You WASH them?

    I thought you were a dude, you big girl…

  8. Alan
    November 17th, 2005 @ 8:53 am

    Are you sure you didn’t jam the missing two into your eyes while you were watching Catwoman?

  9. Flasshe
    November 17th, 2005 @ 2:02 pm

    Actually, the only way you can watch Catwoman is to inject heroin directly into your eyeballs.

  10. patty
    November 17th, 2005 @ 8:52 pm

    did you look in the seat cushions…and sometimes they jump out of the little dishwaser basket and under that big flat thingy on the floor of the dishwasher..so go put yer hand up under that and feel around…… imust go now and ponder this black hole of cutlery some more……sounds like a job for flaming carrot

  11. Flasshe
    November 18th, 2005 @ 8:51 am

    I’ve looked everywhere. I suspect foul play and will soon be talking to Persons of Interest.

  12. DMR
    November 18th, 2005 @ 4:07 pm

    I think they were psychically transported into one of your lucid dreamscapes. Have a nap, and go look for them! All the comments about washing forks almost makes me want to clean the one I keep in my drawer here at work. Almost.

  13. DJSmallberries
    November 20th, 2005 @ 8:27 pm

    When you hosted the family birthday dinner thing did you by any chance use disposable plates? If so, I’ll bet your missing forks are in the landfill by now.

  14. Flasshe
    November 20th, 2005 @ 10:37 pm

    I suspect you’re right – Patty suggested the same thing in a later conversation. I did use disposable plates that night, and I wasn’t always the one to throw them away.

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