FlasshePoint

Life, Minutiae, Toys, Irrational Phobias, Peeves, Fiber

L’America

Posted on | October 22, 2008 at 7:50 am | 12 Comments

If I’m reading her comments correctly, this is how to tell if you’re not living in Sarah Palin’s “Real America”:

  • You don’t have to grow your own food.
  • You and your kids play football or baseball instead of hockey or soccer.
  • You wear a business suit or khakis instead of a uniform.
  • You live in a big city.
  • You have never been in the military and don’t have any relatives who have been either.
  • The only thing you’re teaching your kids is sex education.
  • You don’t own a gun and have never been hunting.
  • You think Daylight Savings Time is a concept whose time is past.
  • You don’t get paid for overtime.
  • The only factory you’ve seen is Cheesecake or Old Spaghetti.
  • You don’t go to church on Sunday.
  • The sushi at your local Japanese restaurant is fresh.
  • You don’t possess the qualities of kindness, goodness, or courage.

So, if some of the above apply to you, you’re probably not a Real American. Sorry! Better get on over to Europe where you belong!

Latre.

P.S. Okay, I do have to admit that sometimes I wonder that if a tree falls between the two coasts, does anyone report on it?

Jogged Today: Yes (@ 34°F)
Songs That Came Up On The iPod While Jogging:

  • “Did I Tell You” (The Spinto Band)
  • “The More You Live, The More You Love” (A Flock of Seagulls)
  • “You Choose” (Hypnolovewheel)
  • “Slow Show” (The National)
  • “I-95″ (Fountains of Wayne)
  • “Gypsum Oil Field Fire” (Olivia Tremor Control)
  • “[Aura Untitled Track 14]” (Mission UK)
  • “Ester” (Elefant)

Pet Peeve of the Day: Cloris Leachman survives to dance another day on Dancing With The Stars. Just who is voting for her? And are they the Real America?

Happy Search Term Of The Day That Led To This Blog: “you are wonderfully and cheerfully made in gods eyes”.

Videogame(s) Played Yesterday: Demo of Lego Batman on the PSP.

Comments

12 Responses to “L’America”

  1. Janet
    October 22nd, 2008 @ 7:18 pm

    Hey Flasshe, thanks for the equal time for theism on the “happy search term of the day” segment. And most of the swing states are between the coasts, so now’s our moment in the media spotlight, don’t you think?

  2. InfK
    October 22nd, 2008 @ 9:26 pm

    I worked on DWS about a year and a half ago – was not involved in the voting, but I can state with confidence that the instructors/pros pretty much universally hate the students/stars, so if the voting was up to them it’d be a 2-episode season. They’re definitely not “real America”; the pros are all European or (worse?) Russian and the stars are of course from godless Hollywood, the purulent wellspring of pestilence and moral degeneracy.

    MY question is – why the hell are YOU watching it?

  3. Flasshe
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 10:02 am

    I was just hoping to see your name in the credits.

  4. Sue T.
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 10:02 am

    Wait a second — the pros are NOT all European, unless those cute li’l Mormons Julianne & Derek Hough are masking Polish accents. And Cheryl Burke grew up right here in the Bay Area! Also, there is only one reason for a straight man to watch DWtS: because his wife or girlfriend makes him.

  5. Flasshe
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 10:31 am

    Also, there is only one reason for a straight man to watch DWtS: because his wife or girlfriend makes him.

    There’s two reasons, actually. The other one is “skimpy costumes on the female dancers”.

    But yes, the primary reason is the Girlfriend Factor.

  6. InfK
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 4:37 pm

    I worked on a whole season and still haven’t seen anybody dance, except when Heather Pegleg fell over (the wife had that on endless loop for awhile…) anyhow, you’re right they’re not ALL European, but they are all professionals – they can’t not take it seriously when in front of an audience. And most of the ’stars’ really don’t (except the athletes, who are pretty singleminded competitors too)

    Actually my point was to write some kind of reply without commenting on the list-comedy angle, which I leave to the wife.

  7. Flasshe
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 4:39 pm

    Actually my point was to write some kind of reply without commenting on the list-comedy angle, which I leave to the wife.

    That wasn’t intended as comedy.

  8. yellojkt
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 9:14 pm

    I’m glad my wife hasn’t discovered this show.

  9. DMR
    October 23rd, 2008 @ 10:11 pm

    I’m a real American – and so can you! :-)

  10. the kid
    October 24th, 2008 @ 11:34 pm

    If I’m reading his comments correctly this is how to tell if your living IN Barak Obama’s America.

    you smoke.

    you play frisbee golf.

    you wear tattoo’s.

    you live(in a womb)

    you air raid villages and kill civilians.

    the only thing you teach your kids is where to get there next piercing.

    you’ld rather have a robber put a bullet in your brain than defend yourself.

    you think the constitution is a concept whose time is past.

    you would rather pay union dues than spend the money and keep someone employed.

    you’ve never seen a factory.

    you don’t go to chuch on sunday(except to hear a racist preacher)

    proper tire pressure will fill your gas tank.

    you don’t possess the qualities of self-reliance, patriotism or brains.

    and 1 more… you hang out with terrorists who teach you that if you make more than 250 large you are evil incarnate. except if your a tenured prof at a blue state university.

    latre.

  11. Flasshe
    October 25th, 2008 @ 11:05 am

    Hugh, are you drunk? That doesn’t even make sense. You’re mixing things up.

    It’s the Bush administration that’s been trampling all over the constitution lately…

    Besides, I know McCain supporters who play frisbee golf, but no Obama-ites.

    Air raiding villages?

  12. 2fs
    October 25th, 2008 @ 8:18 pm

    Add one more to “the kid”’s list: People who cant spell right or do grammer proper are up aginst the wall.

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